prestige is everything?

is it not? I used to think it doesn’t really matter. But now, things happening around me seem to be proving me wrong, cuz people judge you for that. I guess in a sense, people do judge you from the background you came from, inevitably. Cuz I do that sometimes, sadly. It’s superficial world we’re living in anyway. But what is really making me think is prestige versus what you really want. I think many of us (people moving on from the A’s) are facing the exact situation here: prestige vs. what you really want. Many are choosing the former, and even I am torn between the two. The stuff you study in the so-called prestigious school may not be what you really want, or can do well in. Would you be better off doing something you really want? I think I might really be choosing something I really truly want, I don’t want to be in somewhere because of the prestige and then regret, thinking of the ‘if-onlys’. Though I believe mum would be quite disappointed, I’ll do myself justice by studying hard and proving to everyone that a prestigious background isn’t everything you need to succeed. But right now, I think I’m only 75% decided. :S and 2 May is just tomorrow. I’m sure I’ll decide after the trip on the 17th.

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I realized that there’s a lot to learn from the people around me- good and bad. I know how difficult it is, sometimes, to see that you mean what you’d said. I mean, especially when emotions are involved. Maybe that’s why love IS blind. Balancing work, love, friends, and family is not easy, I think. In that order, you’d understand which is the group that’s left out most. Although I’ve never been in a relationship before, I believe I’m not one that needs to meet up everyday. I don’t think I’m that sticky and I think I don’t have the energy to meet up everyday. I mean, I don’t see the need to. I’m fine with just messages and phone calls. Yah, ‘you’d most probably say you won’t know it till you’re in one.’ Yarder. ‘You’d want to meet that person everyday if you two are really in love.’ Yes I don’t deny that, but I would think that love is not measured by how often you meet up. I mean, come on, don’t deny that sometimes you’re really quite tired but you just agree to meet up just to make him happy. Isn’t that a bit too tiring? I’d seriously tell him that I’m tired and we could meet up the next day or something. If he really cares, I think he should understand. Probably for the first few months or so, this could last. But in the long run, I think we do get tired and you’d start telling him that you’re tired and don’t-wanna-meet-up kinda thing. And I guess this is where the argument starts. About why is it that we don’t meet up that often and that you’ve changed. But seriously, it’s not that ‘you’ve changed’. Rather it’s what you’d have said in the past but you’d just refrained from doing so. So I hope I can just be myself right from the start and yeah, just be as comfortable as I can. I think this is what ensures a longer-lasting relationship cuz you don’t get burned out that fast.

My colleagues are a nice bunch of people to hang out with. And cuz they’re older, I guess I’ve a lot to learn from them. Especially because my EQ isn’t all that high. I want to be able to sense how others are feeling just by noticing their actions and words. One of my colleagues does that rather well and I find myself looking up to her. I think such people make good bosses too. It’s rather amazing too, that these people are so fun-loving and child-like at times that you forget that they’re at least a decade older than you. Ahh I think I’ll miss them when I leave, and this makes going back to school kinda sad. But you know, I don’t think I wanna do such brainless and suo sui stuff the whole of life. Thinking about school makes me sian... i think i'm still a bit undecided. :(